Poem: A Knight in Tarnished Armor

My strength is failing and my eyes grow dim
As I stumble along in this cold, hard land.
Even as I fall back, pulled away from by this hateful world around me,
I can see your light, beckoning me to stand. 
You are ever faithful to gently pull me back onto your path,
So on I preserve, your knight in tarnished armor.

Down I fell, weakened by constant battle.
Wounded and bloodied, I cried out to you, my Captain, my King.
Can you hear the fear that strikes to my heart?
I need you to save me from perishing.
Ever-faithful, you reach out to ease the anxiety,
The turmoil within your knight in tarnished armor.

Through your strength I stand, your light stilling my troubled spirit.
How long can I continue this fight?
My wounds run deep, but you stand here beside me;
I fight on for you have filled me with your might.
For your glory I will stand here and persevere,
Your knight in tarnished armor.

A Call to Fathers

Fathers,

You are called to be our discipline. Where would we be without your steady hand guiding us through our own folly? 

You are called to be our teachers. Where would we be without your wisdom and direction?

You are called to be a steady aim, firing us into the world with careful precision. Where would we be without you to help us find our place in this world?

You are called to be repairers of broken streets. Where would we be without you to pick up the pieces when we are broken? 

You are called to captain my ship, guiding me through adversity and leading me to adventure. How can I become a captain one day without you there to show me the way?


-Too many times we complain about the sad state of the youth in our culture, but we should be examining the state of relationship with Godly fatherhood and manhood that these youth have been exposed to/ nurtured by.  

One of Satan's greatest victories in this world has been the removal of the Godly father from prominence in a child's life.

Poem: A Mission Call

Were I to receive
A grand call to preach
Or to come inside
Some great home to teach,
Gladly forsake it all
For just one soul to reach;
A mission stand 'gainst hell's influence
Standing firm against the breach.

E're sore back,
But a crust of bread
Tis worth it all
For the Kingdom spread;
Gladly give it all
And see my blood run red,
To hear my Lord say:
"Well done, my faithful stead."

A mission life,
Ne'er his own to give
But for sacrifice
That those around may live.
A lonely path,
One not all might strive;
A mission'ry's path
On which one comes alive.

-Joshua Benefiel, February 2017

Spontaneous Worship

The most authentic worship that I have ever experienced has come outside the walls of the church building. It's never been the same more than once; it's nearly always sprung out of a period of service, of poverty, of giving myself to the Lord when I have been nearly expended.

The majority of these authentic, spontaneous worship sessions have come on the mission field.

Standing in the apex of a tower in Split, Croatia, looking down on the walls of an ancient building, one that started as a palace for one of the most ruthless, anti-Christ emperors of the Romans, before being converted into a Christian cathedral and eventually into a museum, I wept for the blood of my fellow brothers and sisters who had been slain there. I worshipped and experienced God with an expended, exhausted heart.

In the middle of a field that was once the floor of a mini-Coliseum in Salona, outside of Split, Croatia, where Paul and Silas once preached the gospel, we stood together as a small band of Christians and worshipped solemnly. It wasn't flashy, but it was real and it taught me about worshipping God outside of the traditional worship service.

In a small room in Mexico, I learned how God can stir the fire of worship when no one is expecting it. As we stood in a circle to pray for a young girl in our group, the Spirit of the living God fell and we crashed to our knees. Some continued to pray, some read the Scriptures aloud and some began to worship in song to the God who had come to commune with us. And it continued, for hours and hours. Ignoring everything else, we poured ourselves out into worship.

Why is it that the church service struggles so much to foster spontaneous, authentic worship? Routine? Schedule? People looking at their watches, ready to get home?

I don't mean that one can't ever be drawn into the heart of God and pour oneself out in worship during a church service, but it's hard for me. It's hard to ignite the fires of true worship within my heart when I only have three or four praise songs and a thirty minute message with which to do it.

I'm ready for revival in America, where people show up to church ready to pour themselves out before the living God, saying "So what if it is two o'clock in the afternoon and this session has been going on for four hours? I'm going to worship God!"

Do We Still Praise When the Blessings Stop?

"All of my life, in every season, You are still God. I have a reason to sing; I have a reason to worship. I Will bring praise."

Each of us has been through the highs and lows of life. We experience the mountaintop with God, we feel his blessings and Spirit flowing through our lives and then we go through periods of time where it feels like God is ignoring us or has forgotten us: the desert experience.

How easy is it to worship and praise God on the mountaintop? How many of us remember to committing our spirits to praising and worshiping when we arrive in the desert?

One of my favorite Biblical accounts of God's power is the wandering story of Elijah. In 1 Kings 17-19, God leads Elijah on a wandering journey, both a physical and faith journey.

God speaks through Elijah, whom the Bible calls a man "just like us," and says that will not be rain for three years. Imagine receiving such a powerful word of God that you can tangibly see coming to fruition right in front of you! I can only imagine the mountaintop experience that Elijah was having as God led him into a ravine to be served by ravens who brought him meat and bread morning and night.

But then, everything changed. The ravens stopped coming and the brook of water that he'd been drinking from dried up! I imagine there was some confusion on Elijah's part as he wondered what God was doing, why He had led him into the wilderness just to have the food and water stop coming.

The the wandering begins. God leads him to the house of a widow and her son who have no food and who about to die. Elijah blesses their food and the three live that way for a while, with their food being supplied by God's providence. But then the boy gets sick and dies and the woman turns on Elijah! Elijah cries out to God and heals the boy, but it is once again a confusing situation, a far cry from the mountaintop experience.

From there, God leads Elijah to another mountaintop experience: the conflict with the prophets of Baal, where Elijah calls down the fire of God to prove God's might and power. An amazing experience, where God's spirit again flows directly through Elijah in an obvious and tangible way! But Elijah is immediately led back into the desert, where he is downtrodden. He thinks he is the last servant of God in the land.God has to remind him that He has bigger plans than what Elijah can see.

All that to say this: we will go from highs to lows, from seeing God move powerfully in our lives to not seeing God's action in our lives at all. But we still must praise God.

We must set our hearts and minds to say "In every season, He is still God, so I will praise Him." Even in the desert, we must still praise God.

Embarking on God's calling.

Frederick Buechner once said that God's calling for our lives is found at the place where the deep longing and desire He has placed in our hearts meets up with the deep need and hunger that the world is experiencing.

Essentially, that where doing what we desire most to do, realized in the purest, most honest period of self-reflection, most meets the needs of the world around us, there we will find the calling that God has for us.

So why is so hard to make to that X in the road, to find ourselves living within the rich blessing and opportunity of existing in God's calling?

Why is it so easy to get distracted? Why do I feel stories burning holes in my brain that I need to get out on paper (part of the soul-stirring identification of the deep longing that God has placed within me) and yet I struggle to accomplish finishing any of them except in little bursts, keeping me from yet reaching the place where the deep longing within me will serve the deep need of the world around me.

Is it selfishness on my part? That I don't really want to share my deep longing with the world, maybe for fear that it will be laughed at and thrown back in my face? I don't think this is the case; I just feel like my ability to meet the world's needs with my deep longing would be much better accomplished if God would work it that I could be locked away in a mountain cabin for several months... (Said tongue-in-cheek).

I hope that we as Christian can get better at recognizing what the deep longing within us is and how God is directing us to meet the needs of the world around us.

Poem: A Simple Shepherd

Only a simple shepherd, leading my flock
Through the barren hills toward town.
How could I know that my life would be forever changed
By the star above me shining down?

Only a simple shepherd, I peered into the stable;
Led to see a little baby, lain between the horse and sheep.
How could I know know that the world would be changed
By this little babe before me asleep?

-Just a little Christmas story poem that I started writing the other day.